How Things Really Work

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by flagriller, Oct 8, 2007.

  1. flagriller

    flagriller Smoking Fanatic OTBS Member

    Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House in DC One from New Jersey, another from Tennessee and the third, Florida. They go with a White House official to examine the fence.

    The Florida contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. "Well," he says, "I figure the job will the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me."

    The Tennessee contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me."

    The New Jersey contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, "$2,700"

    The official, incredulous, says, "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?"

    The New Jersey contractor whispers back, "$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the fence."

    "Done!", replies the government official.

    And that friends, is how it all works !!!
  2. pigcicles

    pigcicles Master of the Pit OTBS Member SMF Premier Member

    I gotta get into government contracting.. that's all there is to it.
  3. blackhawk19

    blackhawk19 Master of the Pit OTBS Member

    I have a nephew who's family construction business had a contract with FEMA. They got paid ungodly amounts for installing the blue tarps and other jobs. He made enough that he now owns half the land in his small home town, the only restaurant, most of the rental property in town. He is finishing up building his 6000 sq ft house, has a diesel pusher RV, oh and about 20 FEMA trailers showed up there, says FEMA gave them to him. He's only 27, yeah that's the way it's done[​IMG]

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