From the New Zealand Association Of Retired People (Caution-Spew Alert!!)

[Dutch]

From the New Zealand Association Of Retired People Questions and Answers

Q: Where can men over the age of 60 find younger, sexy women who are interested  in them?   A: In a bookstore under "Fiction'

Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause? A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can build a shed. When you're done you'll have a place to live.

Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your 60-plus year old husband? A: Tell him you're pregnant.

Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles? A: Take off your glasses.

Q: Seriously! What can I do for these Crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face? A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out..

Q: Why should 60-plus year old  people use valet parking? A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.

Q: Is it common for 60-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage? A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is the problem.

Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly? A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.

Q: Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses? A: On their foreheads.

Q: What is the most common remark made by 60-plus year olds when they enter antique stores? A: "Gosh, I remember these!"

SMILE, You've still got your sense of humor, RIGHT?

 

[nwdave]

  If this weren't so true, it would be humorous.  I try to keep written notes for the shopping lists and things to do each day, but I keep forgetting where I left the lists. 

 

[biaviian]

  If this weren't so true, it would be humorous.  I try to keep written notes for the shopping lists and things to do each day, but I keep forgetting where I left the lists. 

Dave, that happens to me and I'm 30.  That has ALWAYS happened to me.  I will get up, to pee, get distracted for 10-30+ minutes, and forget that I needed/wanted to pee.  That happens on a daily basis and has happened twice since 6am (5 hours).

 

[sunman76]

 

[alelover]

I've been suffering from CRS for years and am always finding my glasses on my head. I'm 10 years ahead of my time.

 

[meateater]

 

[SmokinAl]

God that describes me!  

 

[venture]

Dave, you are really in bad shape.  I usually remember exactly where the lists are.  Right after I get to the store!

Good luck and good smoking.

 

[justpassingthru]

Dave, ...by the time I've found the paper and pen I've forgotten what I was going to write.  LOL

Seriously, right after I have forgotten what I wanted to write down I think how practical a small hand held recorder would be, then when I finally remember what it was, when I go to the store I forget to look for a recorder!  LOL LOL

Old age, don't ya just love it!  

Biaviian, believe me, ...after 60 we don't ever forget the need to pee.

Gene

 

[alaskanbear]

WELL, I AM OLD ENOUGH TO HAVE ACTUALLY PASSED FROM CRS AND GRADUATED TO CRAFT! I FEEL SO DAM LUCKY.

Rich

P.S.: CRAFT = Cant   Remember   A    F--king   Thing.

 

[scarbelly]

I just passed the magical 65 in June and I can relate to all of them

 

[nwdave]

Heck, I'm knocking on the door of 67....what was the question???