The Power of the Almighty Chief Petty Officer
As a crowded airliner is about to take-off, the peace is suddenly shattered by a five-year-old boy who picks that moment to throw a wild temper tantrum. No matter what his frustrated, embarrassed mother does to try to calm him down, the boy continues to cream furiously and kick the seats around him. Suddenly, from the rear of the plane, an older man in the uniform of a US Navy Chief begins to make his way up the aisle. Stopping the frustrated mother's upraised hand, the white haired, courtly, soft-spoken Chief leans down and, motioning toward his collar, whispers something into the boy's ear. Instantly, the boy calms down, gently takes his mother's hand, and quietly fastens his seat belt. All the other passengers burst into spontaneous applause. As the Chief slowly makes his way back to his seat, one of the cabin attendants touches his sleeve. 'Excuse me Chief', she asks quietly, 'could I ask you what magic words you used on that little boy?' The Chief smiled serenely and gently confides, 'I showed him my anchors, service stripes, and battle ribbons, and then explained to him that they entitled me to throw one passenger out of the plane.'
************************************************** ********* The Retired Chief
The old Chief finally retired from the Navy and got that chicken ranch he always wanted. He took with him his lifelong pet parrot. First morning at
0430, the parrot squeaked and said, 'Off yer hocks and don yer socks. Reveille'. The old chief told the parrot, 'we are no longer in the Navy. Go back to sleep.' The next morning, the parrot did the same thing. The old Chief told the parrot, 'Look, if you keep this up, I will put you out in the chicken pen.' Again the parrot did it, and true to his word, the Chief put the parrot in the chicken pen. About 0630, the Chief was awakened by one heck of a ruckus in the chicken pen. He went out to see what was the matter. The parrot had about 40 white chickens in formation and on the ground lay 3 bruised and beaten brown ones. The parrot was saying, 'By God, when I say fall out in dress whites, I don't mean Khakis!'
************************************************** *********** Sleeping With A Snorer
By the time the Chief pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken. 'You've got to have a room somewhere,' he pleaded, 'or just a bed, I don't care where.' 'Well, I do have a double room with one occupant - a Marine Gunny,' admitted the manager, 'and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I'm not sure it'd be worth it to you.' 'No problem,' the tired Chief assured him, 'I'll take it.' The next morning the Chief came down to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. 'How'd you sleep?' asked the manager. 'Never better.' The manager was impressed. 'No problem with the other guy snoring?' 'Nope, I shut him up in no time', said the Chief. 'How'd you manage that?' asked the manager. 'He was already in bed, snoring away, when I came in the room,' the Chief explained. 'I went over, gave him a kiss on the cheek, and said, 'Goodnight, beautiful,' and he sat up all night watching me.'
************************************************** ********** Dangerous... A Seaman saying, 'I learned this in Boot Camp...' A Petty Officer saying, 'Trust me, sir...' A Lieutenant JG saying, 'Based on my experience...' A Lieutenant saying, 'I was just thinking...' A Chief chuckling, 'Watch this ****...'
As a crowded airliner is about to take-off, the peace is suddenly shattered by a five-year-old boy who picks that moment to throw a wild temper tantrum. No matter what his frustrated, embarrassed mother does to try to calm him down, the boy continues to cream furiously and kick the seats around him. Suddenly, from the rear of the plane, an older man in the uniform of a US Navy Chief begins to make his way up the aisle. Stopping the frustrated mother's upraised hand, the white haired, courtly, soft-spoken Chief leans down and, motioning toward his collar, whispers something into the boy's ear. Instantly, the boy calms down, gently takes his mother's hand, and quietly fastens his seat belt. All the other passengers burst into spontaneous applause. As the Chief slowly makes his way back to his seat, one of the cabin attendants touches his sleeve. 'Excuse me Chief', she asks quietly, 'could I ask you what magic words you used on that little boy?' The Chief smiled serenely and gently confides, 'I showed him my anchors, service stripes, and battle ribbons, and then explained to him that they entitled me to throw one passenger out of the plane.'
************************************************** ********* The Retired Chief
The old Chief finally retired from the Navy and got that chicken ranch he always wanted. He took with him his lifelong pet parrot. First morning at
0430, the parrot squeaked and said, 'Off yer hocks and don yer socks. Reveille'. The old chief told the parrot, 'we are no longer in the Navy. Go back to sleep.' The next morning, the parrot did the same thing. The old Chief told the parrot, 'Look, if you keep this up, I will put you out in the chicken pen.' Again the parrot did it, and true to his word, the Chief put the parrot in the chicken pen. About 0630, the Chief was awakened by one heck of a ruckus in the chicken pen. He went out to see what was the matter. The parrot had about 40 white chickens in formation and on the ground lay 3 bruised and beaten brown ones. The parrot was saying, 'By God, when I say fall out in dress whites, I don't mean Khakis!'
************************************************** *********** Sleeping With A Snorer
By the time the Chief pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken. 'You've got to have a room somewhere,' he pleaded, 'or just a bed, I don't care where.' 'Well, I do have a double room with one occupant - a Marine Gunny,' admitted the manager, 'and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I'm not sure it'd be worth it to you.' 'No problem,' the tired Chief assured him, 'I'll take it.' The next morning the Chief came down to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. 'How'd you sleep?' asked the manager. 'Never better.' The manager was impressed. 'No problem with the other guy snoring?' 'Nope, I shut him up in no time', said the Chief. 'How'd you manage that?' asked the manager. 'He was already in bed, snoring away, when I came in the room,' the Chief explained. 'I went over, gave him a kiss on the cheek, and said, 'Goodnight, beautiful,' and he sat up all night watching me.'
************************************************** ********** Dangerous... A Seaman saying, 'I learned this in Boot Camp...' A Petty Officer saying, 'Trust me, sir...' A Lieutenant JG saying, 'Based on my experience...' A Lieutenant saying, 'I was just thinking...' A Chief chuckling, 'Watch this ****...'
