Hey all, back for the moment. Do you ever wonder if...

[forluvofsmoke]

Just wanted to let those who were following my smoke on the 21st know what's up. I've asked that Piney delete those 3 threads for me, as I was not able to get more pics to finish it all up...fact is we had problems at the house and I couldn't even finish the smoke.

Has anyone ever felt so frustrated that they wondered why they even tried to cook anymore? Anyway, that's where I'm at right now. Everything was going great that beautiful mid-winter Saturday...the butts were in the thin blue, then, came the Chuck, started some of the smoked beans ingredients, ABTs were coming together, I was still thinking about getting the twice smoked tators ready and BAM!!!!!!!!! It all blew up in my face.............again.............

So, I guess I've got about a 20% success rate on outdoor cooking in the past 6 months, and I think I've pretty much used up the last of my ambition for awhile. I decided to put off building my outdoor kitchen and meat curing refer. Something is going wrong most of the time lately when I'm getting things rolling in the smokers, and I really had my hopes up for this last one, but...Murphy's Law again.

So, I'm thinking for right now that if I can at least keep up my hopes, I'll try to get a semi-homebuilt meat grinder together and also, a homebuilt stuffer. The rest is gonna be too much for me right now. I'm in no rush to start anything anymore though...I'm just beaten down into the dirt...I think I need to just lay low and get this all behind me...hopefully forget about it for now.

With that said, I probably won't be on the forum much for awhile. It's depressing to see so much fine food here and then, I start to think about doing a nice smoke, and then again, I start thinking about the bad Karma I seem to have. I'm not superstitious, but, dammit, what's going on?

Well, I guess that's all I wanted to say for now. I'll check for PMs, when I think of it, but I mainly want to just stay away and get things sort out, if that's possible.

Hope everyone can understand...and no, it is not the members here, it's just the forum's effect on me...you're a great bunch of people who I consider to be my friends anywhere! I'll be in touch, hopefully with some pics of my new project ideas in working form...that's my goal for now, but, I'm gonna go REALLY slow on this.

Thanks to everybody, for just being you!

Eric

 

[pineywoods]

Eric I hope it all works out for you and remember we'll be here when you come back.

 

[rw willy]

Take care of your business. We (the world) will still be here when you get the chance.
Remember: Someone out there has it worse then you, no matter what it seems like.
Best of luck to you.

 

[gooose53]

Take care my friend....we'll be thinking of ya!!

 

[slickrat]

What do you mean "it all blew up in your face"? What went wrong? Wouldn't it be better to approach the problem head on than quit? Get back on that horse!!!

 

[justsmoke2]

Hey 4 I feel your pain. Mine was with making venison brats for a recently disabled friend. Both batches turned out salty so I gave on the brats after great success with breakfast sausage. So next was a Pennslyvania type balogna was leary about another salty product. So I left out the salt and well it was bland. So back to meat balls and meat loaf for the next smoke to build my confidence back up.

 

[cman95]

Eric, go and get all your ducks in a row. I feel your pain and hope everything works out for you. Good luck buddy, we will be waiting.

 

[bbq bubba]

Dude, with all due respect, you've done this already here.

Fix your chit and get back to smoking!

 

[forluvofsmoke]

It was family stuff...things I wasn't dealing well with, mostly homelife, some work related issues. Then, the primer-cord for the powder keg got lit: my oldest daughter landed herself in the hospital for an emergency visit, while I was in the middle of a potentially superb smoke...she's OK, she just got a well deserved scare for not dressing according to the weather and got hit with a little respiratory distress. Maybe now she'll listen to her mom & dad...doubt that though, she's 16 yrs old...oh, to be young, and not as smart as we think. I didn't even mention it to her, not even after she got home...mom took care of that, so, I left it at that.

The blowing-up part was dinner got screwed up because I couldn't stay with it...This has happened many times in the past, so it just got me thinking...why do I bother? I ghuess what has keep me plugging away at, even knowing the risk being pretty high for another failure, is that I love to cook and everybody loves to eat what I cook. I just don't want to let that feeling fall by the wayside. I'm trying to keep a good attitude, it's just not easy in my situation.

I know, keep trying.

I've been re-thinking some of the ways I've been handling things at home and figuring out better ways to keep things straight. Talked about some things with my wife after getting home from work tonight, and she's got a positive attitude about what we discussed...so, things are looking up. She didn't force anything on me, and waited until I was ready to talk. It took me 4 days to get a good start at sorting my thoughts, and I'm getting a better idea what I want out of our family life, at least for the near future. I guess the main thing is this: if you find a problem, fix it ASAP...we just don't get alot of time to discuss issues, so that's got to be addressed right away...making time to work things out quickly.

I still have some things to work on, and so does the rest of the family, we all know it.

Anyway, I'm off work for two days, and got an email confirmation tonight on the full shipment of my site-to-store order being ready for pickup. My wife wanted to spend the day together, shopping, and...chatting...we NEED it. We know more than anyone how quickly five kids can make your hair turn grey!!!

I still have to figure out how to keep the good smokes from going bad...too many variables with this many bodies under one roof, all relying on each other...school sporting events, practice, etc., extra trips to the store for last minute menu items..run, run, run...wheeeeeeeeewwwwwwww!!!

And, here's me, just trying to keep my sanity, along with my wife! LOL!!! Such is life.

Well that's it for the moment...my chin's held up really high tonight...I feel alot better than I did a few days ago! Even just writing about this has me thinking of a few other things I can work on.

Thanks everyone...I'll keep in touch.

Eric

 

[forluvofsmoke]

Workin' on it, man...just more to it that meets the eye. I'm still thinking about my builds, etc., just got to focus on other stuff for now.

Later

Eric

 

[forluvofsmoke]

No doubt, no doubt...I hope they have better ways of handling their troubles...I've been pretty far of balance for WAY TO LONG...I realized that today.

Thanks

Eric

 

[got14u]

I'm sure you heard this before and I'm not sure on how you feel about this but give praying a try...he may not answer when you want him to. But he will answer your prayer when he knows he needs to...and i do know , i have five kids also and boy can they be a hand full !!!!

 

[pops6927]

"....Maybe now she'll listen to her mom & dad...doubt that though, she's 16 yrs old...oh, to be young...."

Oh hell, there ya go.. you've got TEENAGERS! Explains everything - your life is pure havoc until they get in their 20's - absolutely normal, believe me.. the stories I could tell! But! There is a bright side.. just keep thinking.. "grandkids.. grandkids.. grandkids.." You'll come through it fine - don't get frustrated, just know that the only order you'll have for a while is disorder!

 

[pignit]

In the midst of all the havoc.... never forget....... create your own joy! Been there.... done that.....!

 

[davenh]

Eric..

The stuff you listed could be describing any one of us.

You take it one issue at a time and try to stop focusing on how bad it is. Problem now is you are focusing on the bad and that's all your seeing. Take the opportunity to feel good about yourself and recognize when good things happen too. Stop worrying about whether some guy named Karma is crapping on ya. Little secret...he doesn't exist, it's just life and the luck of the draw you get with it. Life is a law of averages. There is good and bad usually in equal dosages.

Eventually it will be better, once you get that in your head you can relax and start enjoying the good parts of your life.

Take a good look around at your life, your wife seems ready to stand by you, you got a job, a family, so it can't be too bad.

Hey..if a six hour smoke doesn't work, do a shorter one or make something that can survive an emergency. Hang in there and roll with the punches

.