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Forrest Gump at Pearly Gates

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by meateater, Dec 8, 2010.

  1. meateater

    meateater Legendary Pitmaster SMF Premier Member

    The day finally arrived. Forrest Gump died and goes to Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are closed, and Forrest approaches

    the Gatekeeper. St. Peter said, "Well, Forrest, it is certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we

    have been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven."Forrest responds, "It shore is good

    to be here, St Peter, sir. But nobody ever told me about any entrance exam. I shore hope that the test ain't too hard. Life was a big enough test as it was.St Peter continued

    to say, Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions
    First: What two days of the week begin with the letter T ?
    Second: How many seconds are there in a year?
    Third: What is God's first name?"

    Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter who waved him up and said, "Now that you have had a chance to think over the

    questions, tell me your answers.Forrest replied, "Well, the first one - which two days in the week begin with the letter 'T'? Shucks, that one is easy.. That would be Today

    and Tomorrow.The Saint's eyes opened wide, and he exclaimed, "Forrest that is not what I was thinking, but you do have a point. I guess I did not specify, so I will give you

    credit for that answer. How about the next one?" asked St. Peter.
    "How many seconds in a year? Now that one is harder," replied Forrest, "But I thunk and thunk about that, and I guess the only answer can be twelve.Astounded, St. Peter

    said, "Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"
    Forrest replied, "Shucks, there is got to be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd...
    "Hold it, interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you are going with this, and I see your point, though that was not quite what I had in mind but I will have to give you credit for that

    one, too. Let us go on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God's first name?
    "Sure", Forrest replied, "it's Andy."
    "Andy?"exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St. Peter, "OK, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world

    did you come up with the name 'Andy' as the first name of God?""Shucks, that was the easiest one of all," Forrest replied, "I learnt it from the song. 'ANDY WALKS WITH

    St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates and said: "Run, Forrest, run."
  2. adiochiro3

    adiochiro3 Master of the Pit OTBS Member

    Good one!
  3. smokeamotive

    smokeamotive Smoking Fanatic

  4. ak1

    ak1 Master of the Pit OTBS Member

  5. daveomak

    daveomak Epic Pitmaster OTBS Member SMF Premier Member

    Simple, is usually the best. That was the best.
  6. Bearcarver

    Bearcarver SMF Hall of Fame Pitmaster Group Lead OTBS Member

    Good-un fo sho.