AP: DALLAS, TX.

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by eman, Nov 4, 2010.

  1. eman

    eman Smoking Guru Staff Member Moderator OTBS Member

    Here's what a 1-6 record will get you.Texas State Police are cracking down on SpeedersThe Texas State Police are cracking down on speeders heading into Dallas . For the first offense, they give you 2 Dallas Cowboy tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them. Q. What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?A. The Dallas Cowboys Q. What do the Dallas Cowboys and Billy Graham have in common?A. They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ". Q. How do you keep a Dallas Cowboy out of your yard?A. Put up a goal post.Q. What do you call a Dallas Cowboy with a Super Bowl ring?A. Old Q. What's the difference between the Dallas Cowboys and a dollar bill?A. You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.Q. How many Dallas Cowboys does it take to win a Super Bowl?A. Nobody remembers. Q. What do the Cowboys and a possums have in common?A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
     
  2. athabaskar

    athabaskar Smoking Fanatic

    43 years without a Super Bowl and suddenly folks from Loseranna feel the need to Cowboy bash. Q. Why do people Cowboy bash? A. They are the biggest target because of their past success. Q. Why is Texas so windy? A. You know the answer.
     
  3. eman

    eman Smoking Guru Staff Member Moderator OTBS Member

    hee hee.

     Yea you right . we been the butt of all the NFL jokes for 43 years . Somebody elses turn.

     Besides i got that from a friend in dallas.
     
  4. bearcarver

    bearcarver Smoking Guru OTBS Member

    I've heard those before, but it was awhile ago, when Michael Ervin was there. There was one more on the list then. It was something like why Ervin wasn't allowed in the huddle?---Because he was on probation & was not allowed to associate with "known felons".

    Dallas has nearly always been a great team, but I think the reason people bash them is because they get sick of hearing them bragging. Like the "America's Team"---Who says?  Or why they don't close their roof---"Because God wants to watch his Cowboys".

    That's just asking to be bashed.

    My Eagles haven't won a Super Bowl yet (Championship in 1960--LOL), but I still root for them, and I have been known to bash Dallas too, and Washington, and the Giants, etc, etc. I guess no Cowboy fans ever bashed any other team???

    NFL East has nearly always been the toughest division, and that calls for some fierce rivalry, and usually a lot of bashing.

    Just my 2 pennies,

    Bear

    Sorry if I stepped on your thread a bit Eman
     
  5. eman

    eman Smoking Guru Staff Member Moderator OTBS Member

    No problem ,It's all in fun .  Heck i noticed at the dallas game the other day that some of their fans stole the Aints bags from us.
     
  6. ou8one2

    ou8one2 Newbie

    Ya Know why Oklahoma is so windy?   Because Dallas SUCKS!
     
  7. chefrob

    chefrob Master of the Pit OTBS Member

    az
    there, i fixed it for you...............
     
     
  8. athabaskar

    athabaskar Smoking Fanatic


    True chefrob, but you'll never hear me bash on the Steelers just cuz. Then again, after last night I feel like the Boys deserve a good bashing. Total meltdown. Just embarrassing.
     
  9. scarbelly

    scarbelly Smoking Guru OTBS Member

    It could be worse ! You could be a Chargers fan cause that is the only team left in So Cal
     
  10. bearcarver

    bearcarver Smoking Guru OTBS Member

    LOL---Yeah but if the "Boys" play one good game all year, we know who that will be against!
     
  11. chefrob

    chefrob Master of the Pit OTBS Member

    az
    you should............you don't think the gain'ts, 'skins, and fleaguls talk all nice about the boys do ya? they just wanna stop you from goin' to the dance, we wanna send ya home once ya get it....it's called "football", the best sport on earth!

    BTW- the '70's cowgirls were one of the best teams of all time.
     
     
  12. meateater

    meateater Smoking Guru SMF Premier Member

    Easy, I'm a lifelong Dallas Fan.
     
  13. chefrob

    chefrob Master of the Pit OTBS Member

    az
    i feel for ya............there is a 12 step program for that kind stuff.[​IMG]
     
  14. meateater

    meateater Smoking Guru SMF Premier Member

    I might more than need that this year. At least Wade is gone. If only  JJ would listen to me! [​IMG]
     
     
    Last edited: Nov 8, 2010
  15. chefrob

    chefrob Master of the Pit OTBS Member

    az
    it's the best for ya'all...........i like how cowerred's name keeps coming up. good coach but won't make the gutzy call when it counts. if you ride the bus for 80 yards or so, why would you give the ball to cordel........
     
  16. bearcarver

    bearcarver Smoking Guru OTBS Member

    Alright I confess:

    I even knew an Eagles Cheerleader, yet I have always said the Dallas Cowgirls have NO competition!

    Might be those little Cowgirl outfits, with the short skirts & high boots, like were popular in my day! [​IMG]
     

  17. 'nother oldie but a goodie...(during the Micheal Ervin Era)  Q. How do you get a Cowboy to stand up?  A.  Ask will the defendant please rise
     
  18. jdt

    jdt Smoking Fanatic SMF Premier Member

    My pittsburgh lovin buddy is the worst, texting and talking smack

    couple weeks ago-the cowgirls have circled the wagons

    meltdown the other night-the wagons are on fire

    Wade Fired-Pack up the bags Laurie, ya know the drill

    He is all talking about 7 waw waw waw, sixburg blah blah blah
     
  19. jirodriguez

    jirodriguez Master of the Pit OTBS Member SMF Premier Member

    Well at least as a life long Raiders fan I can hold my head high! ........ with tears running down my cheeks... lol.
     
  20. native

    native Fire Starter


    Me, too, Meateater.  Still some funny stuff, tho.
     

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