What Day Is It?

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sawhorseray

Legendary Pitmaster
Original poster
OTBS Member
★ Lifetime Premier ★
Oct 17, 2014
7,932
12,793
Gilbert, AZ
A father passing by his son's bedroom
Noticed the room unusually clean and saw an envelope propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, 'Dad'. With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands.
Dear, Dad. It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.
I've been finding real passion with Stacy. She is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing's, tattoos, her tight motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am.
But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.
In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so that Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!
Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your many grandchildren.
Love, your son, Josh
P.S . Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Jason's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on the kitchen table. Call when it is safe for me to come home!
Kenny

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Funny stuff! As usual the Animal ones ring true and crack my up...JJ
 
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Can't pick a favorite today. Too many good ones!
As far as what day it is, only two days matter since I retired. Trash pickup day is Tuesday.
You can't buy beer or liquor in Indiana until noon on Sunday.
Every other day is Saturday....
:-)
 
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Ray, all of them are good ones.
I can especially relate to the Dr. Welby joke.
A bottle of Boone's or Mad Dog 20/20 and a Bob Seger 8 track meant someone was getting lucky that night.
Went through a lot of Boone's Farm during my one year at college but it didn't make me lucky LOL!
Good to know that I'm immune, though. Possibly how I survived the '70s.....
 
All good ones again Ray. The first one was great, and I guess I'm a Seenager. Thanks great way to get through the rest of the week. Oh we drank Night Train, til we fell off the tracks. Then switched to Boone's Farm, lol.
 
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