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sawhorseray

Legendary Pitmaster
Original poster
OTBS Member
★ Lifetime Premier ★
Oct 17, 2014
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12,652
Gilbert, AZ
A married woman is having an affair.

Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine-year-old son in the closet.

One day the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet, as well.

Inside the closet, the little boy says, “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?”

“Yes, it is,” the man replies. “You wanna buy a baseball?” the little boy asks.

“No thanks,” the man replies.

“I think you do want to buy a baseball,” the little extortionist continues.

After considering the position he is in, the man replies “OK. How much?”

“Twenty-five dollars,” the little boy replies.
“TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?!” the man repeats incredulously but complies to protect his hidden position.

The following week, the lover is visiting the woman again when she hears a car in the driveway and, again, places her lover in the closet with her little boy.

“It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” the boy starts off.

“Yes it is,” replies the man.

“Wanna buy a baseball glove? ” the little boy asks.

“OK. How much?” the hiding lover responds, acknowledging his disadvantage.

“Fifty dollars,” the boy replies, and the transaction is completed.

The next weekend, the little boy’s father says “Hey son, go get your ball and glove and we’ll play some catch.”

“I can’t. I sold them,” replies the little boy.

“How much did you get for them?,” asks the father, expecting to hear the profit in terms of lizards and candy.

“Seventy-five dollars,” the little boy says.

“SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?! That’s thievery! I’m taking you to church right now. You must confess your sin and ask for forgiveness,” the father explains as he hauls the child away.

At the church, the little boy goes into the confessional, draws the curtain, sits down, and says “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?”

“Don’t you start that shit in here now,” the priest replies.



These next few might require a second look, maybe a third!

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When a group of tourists visited a crocodile farm, the owner of the place launched a daring proposal. “Whoever dares to jump, swim to shore and survive, I will give 1 million dollars.”
Nobody dared to move, but suddenly a man jumped into the water and desperately swam towards the shore while he was chased by all the crocodiles. With great luck he arrived, taking the admiration of everyone. The owner announced “We have a brave winner.”
After collecting their reward, the couple returned to the hotel, and upon arrival, the manager told him “he was very brave to jump” the man replied, “I didn't jump, someone pushed me!”
His wife smiled...
Moral of the story — Behind every successful man, there is a woman who pushes him.

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