Fred (A Little Twisted Humor)

[tx smoker]

A cop pulls a guy over one night for running a red light. He walks up to the car and starts asking the usual questions.
Cop: What's your name sir?
Driver: Fred
Cop: What's your last name Fred?
Fred: I don't have one
Cop: You don't have a last name?
Fred: No sir. I used to but don't any more

The cop is thinking this guy is a bit flaky but seems harmless so figures he will play along
Cop: How is it that you used to have a last name but don't any more?
Fred: It's a really long story officer
Cop: It's a slow night so I have time
Fred: When I was born my name was Fred Dingaling. I know, stupid name and I hated it. All the kids used to laugh and make fun of me so I never had any friends. Stayed home and studied all the time. Got good grades and won a scholarship to go to medical school. When I graduated I was Fred Dingaling MD. Worked at a large practice for a while and got bored. Went back to school to become a dentist. When I graduated I was Fred Dingaling MD, DDS. Didn't want to go back into a large practice so started my own office. After a while business was good so I hired a cute little secretary / office manager. We started fooling around and she gave me VD. Now I'm Fred Dingaling MD, DDS, with VD. The AMA found out about the VD and took away my MD. Now I'm Fred Dingaling DDS with VD. The ADA found out about the AMA taking away my MD so they took away my DDS. Now I'm Fred Dingaling with VD. Not long after that the VD took away my dingaling so now I'm just Fred

Sorry about that folks....
Robert

 

[Brokenhandle]

It's still funny every time I hear it!

Ryan

 

[DRKsmoking]

first time for me , but I lead a sheltered life

David

 

[bauchjw]

Oh man Did this joke come around a little after Chuck Berry’s song “My Ding-A-Ling” ?

 

[Brokenhandle]

Oh man Did this joke come around a little after Chuck Berry’s song “My Ding-A-Ling” ?

You should see the look I get when I start singing that to my wife! It would maybe help if I could carry a tune in a bucket lol!

Ryan

 

[MJB05615]

That is a good one Robert. I hadn't heard it before.

 

[HalfSmoked]

Hahaha new to me but funny as hell.

Warren

 

[bauchjw]

You should see the look I get when I start singing that to my wife! It would maybe help if I could carry a tune in a bucket lol!
Ryan

Maybe its because youre dancing in cowboy boots and shorts when you are singing it?

 

[tx smoker]

Maybe its because youre dancing in cowboy boots and shorts when you are singing it?

Ryan gave up the shorts a long time ago and graduated to a burlap thong. Now there's a sight to see!!

Robert

 

[bauchjw]

Ryan gave up the shorts a long time ago and graduated to a burlap thong. Now there's a sight to see!!
Robert

You've seen that? Wow . . . I recommend bleach directly on the eyeballs and a healthy dose of Psilocybin mushrooms to deal with the PTSD!

 

[GaryHibbert]

It's still funny every time I hear it!

Ryan

Yeah, me too. That joke never gets old, far as I'm concerned.
Gary