The kinda people you meet at Wal-Mart

[uncletykie]

So the other night I went to Wal-Mart to pick up some RO Lump and dog food this happened, As some of you know I have two St. Bernards and the other night I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog(?). On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall, black guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd been poisoned. I told her no; I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me. I thought the black guy was going to pee his pants

 

[got14u]

lol...priceless thread here...this may go on for months...points..i gotta give them to ya when i can...i have meat my share of strange at walmart as well. I will have to think on a specific time tho....update to follow

 

[carpetride]

This will go far! I've already sent it on to other. Great post Unc

 

[grothe]

Now That's Funny!!!!!

 

[smokin' dick]

That was REALLY funny!!

Now Uncle, How is it you have all those SMF Positions listed under your avatar?
You must be one busy guy!

 

[bigbaldbbq]

LMAO!!!! That is great!!:D

 

[irishteabear]

ROFLMBO!! That was funny!

 

[slanted88]

O man...that is hilarious!

 

[uncletykie]

Glad you all Enjoyed my bit of sarcasm and humor

 

[gnubee]

Luckily I had just swallowed a gulp of coffee when I read the punch line or you'd owe me a keyboard.

When I buy a jug of milk the Cashier always asks; "Would you like that in a bag?"
Then I innocently say Oh! no leave it in the jug, it will leak out of a bag. You have to say it with a straight face and it works every time.
You know you really got a dumb one when they try to explain about putting the jug in the bag.

Your Diet is way funnier than the milk in a bag line but you work with what you have.

PS..... Worlds easiest diet..... If it tastes good .....spit it out!!!

 

[phopkins]

Definitely one to try! Not sure if I could pull it off without falling on the floor laughing before I finished though. Points!

 

[meat hunter]

You know I seen this post earlier today and thought it was what I was thinking, the weirdos that one sees at Wal-Mart. Glad I clicked on it just now, that is funny. If you aint laughing at this, there something wrong with you.

 

[sea_munky]

Absolutely HILARIOUS! Thanks for making my day. I read it again later! Good delivery too.

So which one was the weirdo? Were you refering to the lady listening or yourself? hahahha! JK!

 

[kookie]

Thats funny...........lol........good one.......

 

[capt dan]

Got a similar email a couple months back myself, cept it used Target as the store instead. Damned funny though!

 

[howufiga]

hahahaha!!!