TGIFriday Funnies!

[sawhorseray]

A bank robber pulls out gun points it at the teller, and says, "Give me all the money or you're geography!" The puzzled teller replies, "Did you mean to say 'or you're history?'" The robber says, "Don't change the subject!"


A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.

 

[GATOR240]

Keep them coming Ray!

 

[MJB05615]

These are all good. Thanks, great pick me ups to start the day. Well needed most days, very much appreciated.

 

[radioguy]

 

[Brokenhandle]

Ya had some really good ones today Ray!

Ryan

 

[SmokinVOLfan]

 

[sawhorseray]

Well let me tell you about my grandma. She got it in her head that she wanted to join the biker gang that has it's clubhouse just outside of town. She knocks on the door and is greeted by the biggest guy she's ever seen, every bit of 6'10" tall and a lean 350 pounds, covered in tattoos with a beard to his chest. A deep "What do you want" bellows from the doorway, to which she replies, "I want to join your gang." Amused, he decides to play along and asks, "Do you ride?" She told him, "Yep, that's my Harley over there." Surprised, he asks, "Do you smoke?" "Two packs a day", she says, "unless I'm shooting pool, then I'm smoking cigars with Tequila chasers." The big guy's impressed and asks, "Ever been picked up by the Fuzz?" "No," she says, "but I've been swung around by the nipples."

 

[Hawging It]

Funny stuff. Belly laugh on the ripped up bread one!