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Midweek Humor

sawhorseray

Master of the Pit
SMF Premier Member
3,669
3,829
Joined Oct 17, 2014
A blonde city girl named Amy marries a Colorado rancher. One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to Amy, "The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows, so I drove a nail into the 2x4 just above where the cow's stall is in the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?" The rancher leaves for the fields. After a while, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door. “I came to inseminate the cow,” he said. Amy takes him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows, and when Amy sees the nail, she tells him, "This is the one right here." The man, assuming he is dealing with an airhead blonde, asks, "Tell me, lady, 'cause I'm dying to know. How would YOU know that this is the right cow to be bred?" "That's simple," she said. "By the nail that's over its stall," she explains very confidently. Laughing rudely at her, the man says, "And what, pray tell, is the nail for?" The blonde turns to walk away and says sweetly over her shoulder, “I guess it’s to hang your pants on,” she replied. (It's nice to see a blonde winning...once in awhile.)

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More later!
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sawhorseray

Master of the Pit
SMF Premier Member
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Joined Oct 17, 2014
Thanks! I try to go thru and keep the ones that aren't up to PG rated standards off of here, also nothing political, that never works on a forum. Probably more tomorrow! RAY
 

Winterrider

Master of the Pit
OTBS Member
SMF Premier Member
2,867
1,415
Joined Sep 29, 2018
Bear attack~

How to survive~

Montana~


"This is a story of self-control and marksmanship. A woman survived a grizzly bear attack with one well-placed shot from her itsy bitsy .25 caliber Beretta Jetfire.

These are her own words.: While out hiking in Missoula, Montana with my boyfriend, we were surprised when a huge grizzly bear came charging at us out of nowhere. She must have been protecting her cubs because she was extremely aggress...ive. If I had not had my little Beretta Jetfire I would not be here today! I yanked it out of my purse and fired one shot. It hit my boyfriend in his kneecap and the bear caught him easily. While the grizzly mauled the poor cripple, I was able to escape by just walking away at a brisk pace. I love that pistol. I'll find other boyfriends."
-- ReelCamo Girl
 

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