Is It Time Yet?

[sawhorseray]

At one point during a game, the coach called one of his 9-year-old baseball players aside and asked, “Do you understand what co-operation is? What a team is?”


“Yes, coach,” replied the little boy.

“Do you understand that what matters is whether we win or lose together as a team?”

The little boy nodded in the affirmative.

“So,” the coach continued, “I’m sure you know, when an out is called, you shouldn't argue, or curse, or attack the umpire, or call him an asshole.

Do you understand all that?”

Again, the little boy nodded in the affirmative.

The coach continued, “And when I take you out of the game so that another boy gets a chance to play, we don’t call that 'a dumbass decision' or that it means that the coach is 'a shithead', right??”

“Yes, coach.”

“Good”, said the coach. “Now go over there and explain all that to your grandmother.”



”

 

[HalfSmoked]

Great start to a new day.

Warren

 

[halleoneagain]

Yeah Santa, get it right this year! Good stuff Ray!

 

[gmc2003]

Knee slappers right there Ray.

Chris

 

[uncle eddie]

hahaha - thanks for posting!

 

[Colin1230]

Love your sense of humor, Ray.

 

[SecondHandSmoker]

I liked the Snap On one because it's true!

 

[SmokyMose]

All good as usual, Ray, but I got a special kick out the one about Harley riders cracking the throttle. I had several motorcycles in my riding years but never had or wanted a Harley and always wondered why they blipped the throttle at intersections....

 

[tbern]

Thanks Ray!

 

[chopsaw]

Those are good Ray . Sorry to say I've seen the upside down saw in a bucket " trick " .

 

[sawhorseray]

Those are good Ray . Sorry to say I've seen the upside down saw in a bucket " trick " .

Yeah, me too Rich, I had to leave before I had to watch. Guys that wedge the guard on a skilsaw, it's not if, it's when. RAY

 

[chopsaw]

it's not if, it's when

Yup . I worked with a guy they called 9 fingers back in the day . All those old timers had something cut off . One guy was missing a thumb . They used to say he ran around like a chicken with his thumb cut off .

 

[Fueling Around]

@sawhorseray and @chopsaw, those upside down hangers should have made you cringe.
The last one is really sad. The Russians spent the previous 20 years with the same results.

 

[pit 4 brains]

Guys that wedge the guard on a skilsaw,

Mine is wedged. I watched a guy run a worm drive skill saw through his forearm cutting a small piece of OSB. When that saw is cutting, the guard is up.
Just like there's no guard on a chainsaw, you better pay attention to what you are doing. I release the trigger before the end of the cut and stop the blade with the piece I'm holding..
I do not advise or condone the altering or disabling of safety devices.. but hand held saws are a different story. Jigsaws and routers are other examples of finger eaters.

 

[MJB05615]

Another round of great ones Ray! Thanks for sharing, great way to start the Weekend.

 

[old sarge]

Winners all! Thanks!!

 

[GaryHibbert]

Ha!! the "stork and baby" and "I'll ask my dog" are the best.
Having ridden Harleys for 40 plus years, I found the "Harley " joke both funny and Oh So True.
Gary

 

[sawhorseray]

Mine is wedged.

34 years in the carpenter's union, was instructed in the proper use of a skilsaw before I turned 18. You can hold the guard up by pinching it open with your thumb and fingers, two hands on the saw, pretty tough to cut yourself, it will release itself. Guard wedged in place with a shim, just not a very good practice, or very smart.

 

[sawhorseray]

Yup . I worked with a guy they called 9 fingers back in the day . All those old timers had something cut off . One guy was missing a thumb . They used to say he ran around like a chicken with his thumb cut off .

I worked with a guy who had cut off his thumb Rich, they made him a new one with part of a calf muscle. Looked like a sausage and hair would grow on it, soon puke as look at it. He learned the hard way about being a big guard wedger, I apprenticed under him, he taught me how to use one safely. RAY

 

[chopsaw]

I know . I went to shake hands with chicken thumb and ended up in his armpit . No thumb to stop the motion . Even doing it all safe its a 50 50 chance .