The maid in a stately home wants a salary increase. Her ladyship was very upset and asked, sarcastically: "Now Princess, why do you want an increase?" Maid: "Well Madam, there are three reasons why I want an increase.The first is that I iron better than you." Madam: "Who said you iron better than me?" Maid: "The master did." Madam: "Oh"--bit irritated. Maid: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you." Madam: "Nonsense! Who said you were a better cook than I?" Maid: "The master did." Madam: "Oh"----decidedly put off now. Maid: "My third reason is that I make better love than you do." Madam (Very upset now): "NO, don't tell me the master told you THAT, too, you wretch?!! Maid: "No madam, he didn't; the gardener did."