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Children's Science Exam
If you need a good laugh, try reading through these children's answers...
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it...
A man, who worked away from home all week, always made a special effort with his family on the weekends. Every Sunday morning he would take his 7-year old granddaughter out for a drive in the car for some bonding time.
Just him and his granddaughter.
One particular Sunday however, he had a bad...
Dispatcher : 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller : Someone broke into my...
Has anyone ever heard of Irish Potato Candy? I was the Event Manager for a wedding reception at the K of C Hall I belong to and they had two dishes of them sitting on the cake table. Every time I had to go past them I palmed one until I got back in the kitchen. You can not EAT JUST ONE!!! I...
A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.
'Not a chance,' says the husband, 'it is 3:00 in the morning!'
He slams the door and returns to bed...
Has anyone tried "Lawry's Perfect Blend Seasoned Rub For Pork"? I saw it in BJ's yesterday. It was $8.59 for 27 oz. Looked interesting with all the spices in it including orange peel. They had pork Boston butts for $1.20 a pound. Two to a package...averaging about 7.5 to 8 pounds each.
Ray
A distinguished young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her "Father, may I ask a favor?"
"Of course, what may I do for you?"
"Well I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my mother's birthday that is unopened and well over the Customs limits, and I'm...
Coffee and Cream Icing Recipe
1 pound box of Domino's Confectioner Sugar (sifted...You want NO sugar lumps in your icing!!)
1 softened stick of unsalted butter
1 teaspoon of Pure Vanilla Extract
1 miniature bottle of Starbucks Coffee Liqueur (Only use Starbucks! It tastes the BEST of all...
I am new to smoking. I have been DROOOOOOOOOOOOOOLING all over my keyboard for about a week reading this and several other smoking forums. My Original Bradley Smoker is being delivered tomorrow according to FedEx tracking. If you had asked me a week ago if I had ever "rolled a fattie?"....you...
Shown below, is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by an 86 year old woman. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.
Dear Sir:
I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month.
By my...