Real 911 calls.

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by rdevous, Sep 18, 2009.

  1. Dispatcher : 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
    Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner.
    Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
    Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?


    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
    Caller : Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich .
    Dispatcher : Excuse me?
    Caller : I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came back from the bath room, someone had taken a bite out of it.
    Dispatcher : Was anything else taken?
    Caller : No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it!


    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
    Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
    Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
    Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
    Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
    Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.



    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
    Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart
    Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
    Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!

    And the winner is..........

    Dispatcher: 9-1-1
    Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn....I think I'm going to pass out.
    Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?
    Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
    Dispatcher: ! Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
    Caller: No
    Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
    Caller: Running from the Police. [​IMG]


    Ray

     
  2. the iceman

    the iceman Smoking Fanatic

    That last one is classic! [​IMG]
     

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