or Connect
SmokingMeatForums.com › Forums › Just for Fun › Jokes › A Recent Trip To Costco
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

A Recent Trip To Costco

post #1 of 12
Thread Starter 

 

A TRIP TO COSTCO 

 

 

Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog, and I was in the checkout line when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog. 

 

What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. 

 

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete, so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my  story) 

 

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.

 

I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff under an Irish Setter's  tail, and a car hit us both. 

 

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard. 

 

Costco won't let me shop there anymore. 

 

Better watch what you ask retired people! They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say! 

 

 

Bear

 

 

post #2 of 12

You are something else!

 

I can just imagine being the guy in the line behind her, biting my tongue to keep from guffawing too loud and spoiling your fun.

 

Retired Grey Beards of the world unite:-}}

post #3 of 12

Ah... a good classic... I havent heard that one in a while. It's still damn funny! LOL

post #4 of 12
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dale5351 View Post

You are something else!

 

I can just imagine being the guy in the line behind her, biting my tongue to keep from guffawing too loud and spoiling your fun.

 

Retired Grey Beards of the world unite:-}}

That wasn't really me, Dale.

I just cleaned it up & posted it.

I'm still laughing.

 

Bear
 

post #5 of 12

Thanks Bearcarver, I just spit coffee on my laptop. Funny joke.

post #6 of 12

Yea, Funny!

 

 

TJ

No Creosote! A-Maze-N Smokers

Reply
post #7 of 12

Well, I don't have a grey beard but does a moustache count?  Unfortunately, I'm in the "if I'd thought of it sooner, I'd have said" group.  Retired and working on it.yahoo.gif

post #8 of 12

That is simply HISTARICAL!

 

Great one BEAR!

 

Ken

post #9 of 12

Hehehehehe

post #10 of 12

I don't care who you are,That is just plain funny!

post #11 of 12
Photobucket
post #12 of 12

gone


Edited by Kingkoch42 - 12/8/11 at 1:12pm
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Jokes
SmokingMeatForums.com › Forums › Just for Fun › Jokes › A Recent Trip To Costco