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never ask a drunk

post #1 of 3
Thread Starter 
A woman was shopping at the local supermarket where she selected:
A half-gallon of 2% milk
A carton of eggs
A quart of orange juice
A head of lettuce
A 2 lb. can of coffee
A 1 lb. package of bacon
As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk
standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.
While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated,
‘You must be single.’
The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the
derelict’s intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at the six items
on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that
could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status.
Curiosity getting the better of her, she said: ‘Well, you know what, you’re
absolutely right. But how on earth did you know that?’
The drunk replied, â€Cause you’re ugly.’
post #2 of 3
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!
post #3 of 3
Now thats funny. When I was a cop I used to love some of the things drunks would say. I think I am like most cops, I think I have heard one drunk or another say everything possible at one time or another.
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