What follows was written a few years back by a retired Green Beret in a Special Forces forum I frequent. I thought y'all might enjoy it.
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The family got me a pellet grill for Father’s Day but for some time now, I have looked down with disdain and contempt on those who abandon wood fired BBQ in favor of "pellets".
"Hey, while you are mopping the pork shoulder on that pellet grill, you should fix your skirt because I can see your v*gina"
I said that I would always love my children - no matter what.
Then this happened while I was cooking dinner on my offset smoker...
"Dad, that thing is falling apart, you really should replace it and get a pellet grill"
I thought he was kidding but then he dropped this bomb on me:
"I have a Traeger and I love it"
The words cut like a thousand daggers. My son 'came out' as a pellet grill owner. That's right, my son has been cooking on a pellet grill. I had to fight back the tears. You never think it will be YOUR kid that looks you in the eye and says they are in love with a Traeger. That its no different than a gas grill, easier than charcoal, you don't have to stand around all day tending a fire. Then they bring a pellet grill into your home
"We got you a bag of 'Signature Blend' pellets and a grill cover"
What do you say when there is a pellet grill sitting on your patio - right next to your Combination Gas/Charcoal/Offset Smoker? I hope none of you ever feel that level of discomfort and awkwardness.
I have always prided myself on having an open mind - raising my children to treat people the way they would want to be treated - to set an example of judging others on merit and not on some preconceived notions borne of fear or ignorance.
...but then again I never thought one of my sons would shack up with a pellet grill
I was grateful and considerate but only on the surface. Inside I was confused, hesitant, uncertain, and sad.
What would this mean for my old grill? She's been with me for a LONG time. Sure, she is rusted, weathered, and has problems getting to max temperature because of a bad regulator, but I can’t just toss her on a scrap heap with the other grills I used and discarded over the years. I decided the best way to welcome this new pellet grill into my home would be to fix a nice tasty barbeque dinner.
I started a fire of lump charcoal in my Char-Griller and used hickory wood chunks to keep the fire going while I smoked some chicken on my wood fired offset smoker. Clearly my son was disappointed that I was resisting the change of lifestyles. My daughter was quite amused and thought it would be hilarious to get a picture of my patio - with a brand-new pellet grill; hidden away under a cover - while dad smoked chicken and corn-on-the-cob on a wood fired offset smoker.
I stalled for time with excuses like, “I need to read the instructions first" I cooked a LOT of chicken that night. The next night my excuses continued – “we have plenty of leftovers, I was thinking we could have chicken one more night” - then it rained. The rain would prove to be my ally since it kept on for several days, but it wouldn't last. My son's stay was only temporary since he was on leave and would be returning to his duty station in a few days and I was under incredible pressure to cook something on that pellet grill before he returned home to be with his OWN pellet grill.
People deny the broad cultural changes taking place in today’s military but my son NEVER had any interest in pellet grills until joining the Army and being stationed in Colorado. I don't know if it was dope smoking hippies in Colorado or just the constant drone of Army wokeness that introduced him to this pellet grill lifestyle, but what’s done is done...
After running out of excuses, I loaded up the hopper to "season" the grill. I was disgusted with the process; plugging in the control unit, priming the auger,. For the love of peace, pellets look like rabbit food not something you should use to smoke meat. Out of sheer curiosity, I decided to check out the bag that held these ridiculous pellets. Imagine my surprise when I found that 'Signature Blend' was a combination of hickory, maple, and cherry hardwoods that produced the pleasant familiar aroma of barbeque smoke. I was also surprised to learn that pellets burn cleaner than the charcoal and wood chunks I've been using all tese years. I felt a sense of betrayal as I closed the lid on the pellet grill so the ribs could cook. My old Char-Griller sat cold and unused while the smoke wafted from this strange new cooker. I had literally turned my back on the old 'Texas Trio'
When the ribs came off the pellet grill, they looked the same as any other rack of ribs but there was no denying that something had changed. The smoke ring was still there, the bark on the ribs was still there, and I still had to clean up the grate once all was said and done - but something was different. I can't live in denial any longer. I've been cooking on my new Pit Boss Mahogany Series 820D3 Wood Pellet Grill for a few weeks now and I have not been disappointed.
I still have feelings for the Char-Griller, and often find myself leaning against her to drink my coffee when I let my dogs out in the morning. I've cleaned the grates even though I haven’t cooked anything on it since that last batch of smoked chicken. I still haven't replaced the gas regulator. I don't know where I go from here, I just know that I'm still not ready to get rid of my beloved Texas Trio just yet so she just sits there while I continue to experiment with 'pellet cookery'
To be perfectly honest with everyone, I'm writing this while a 7 pound bone-in pork butt is smoking over a blend of Apple, Maple, and Cherry hardwood pellets. So far I’ve smoked a 3 pound beef roast over Jack Daniels Blend Pellets - and it came off the grill tasting like a medium rare steak. Sliced thin, and piled high on pretzel buns with a dab of horseradish and some melted cheese - we had roast beef sandwiches that rivaled the Arby's Beef and Cheddar. Two racks of 3-2-1 Memphis style baby backs came out so succulent and juicy that they looked like they had been brushed with BBQ sauce.
I know some will judge me - so be it – those are the limits of YOUR life while you rule over your own little kingdom of BBQ prejudice and a sour bigotry towards alternative cookstyles. I prefer diversity and inclusion when it is time to cook succulent juicy delicious smoked meats in a judgment free dining room.
My kitchen is your safe space if you dare enter!
______________________________________________________________________________________
The family got me a pellet grill for Father’s Day but for some time now, I have looked down with disdain and contempt on those who abandon wood fired BBQ in favor of "pellets".
"Hey, while you are mopping the pork shoulder on that pellet grill, you should fix your skirt because I can see your v*gina"
I said that I would always love my children - no matter what.
Then this happened while I was cooking dinner on my offset smoker...
"Dad, that thing is falling apart, you really should replace it and get a pellet grill"
I thought he was kidding but then he dropped this bomb on me:
"I have a Traeger and I love it"
The words cut like a thousand daggers. My son 'came out' as a pellet grill owner. That's right, my son has been cooking on a pellet grill. I had to fight back the tears. You never think it will be YOUR kid that looks you in the eye and says they are in love with a Traeger. That its no different than a gas grill, easier than charcoal, you don't have to stand around all day tending a fire. Then they bring a pellet grill into your home
"We got you a bag of 'Signature Blend' pellets and a grill cover"
What do you say when there is a pellet grill sitting on your patio - right next to your Combination Gas/Charcoal/Offset Smoker? I hope none of you ever feel that level of discomfort and awkwardness.
I have always prided myself on having an open mind - raising my children to treat people the way they would want to be treated - to set an example of judging others on merit and not on some preconceived notions borne of fear or ignorance.
...but then again I never thought one of my sons would shack up with a pellet grill
I was grateful and considerate but only on the surface. Inside I was confused, hesitant, uncertain, and sad.
What would this mean for my old grill? She's been with me for a LONG time. Sure, she is rusted, weathered, and has problems getting to max temperature because of a bad regulator, but I can’t just toss her on a scrap heap with the other grills I used and discarded over the years. I decided the best way to welcome this new pellet grill into my home would be to fix a nice tasty barbeque dinner.
I started a fire of lump charcoal in my Char-Griller and used hickory wood chunks to keep the fire going while I smoked some chicken on my wood fired offset smoker. Clearly my son was disappointed that I was resisting the change of lifestyles. My daughter was quite amused and thought it would be hilarious to get a picture of my patio - with a brand-new pellet grill; hidden away under a cover - while dad smoked chicken and corn-on-the-cob on a wood fired offset smoker.
I stalled for time with excuses like, “I need to read the instructions first" I cooked a LOT of chicken that night. The next night my excuses continued – “we have plenty of leftovers, I was thinking we could have chicken one more night” - then it rained. The rain would prove to be my ally since it kept on for several days, but it wouldn't last. My son's stay was only temporary since he was on leave and would be returning to his duty station in a few days and I was under incredible pressure to cook something on that pellet grill before he returned home to be with his OWN pellet grill.
People deny the broad cultural changes taking place in today’s military but my son NEVER had any interest in pellet grills until joining the Army and being stationed in Colorado. I don't know if it was dope smoking hippies in Colorado or just the constant drone of Army wokeness that introduced him to this pellet grill lifestyle, but what’s done is done...
After running out of excuses, I loaded up the hopper to "season" the grill. I was disgusted with the process; plugging in the control unit, priming the auger,. For the love of peace, pellets look like rabbit food not something you should use to smoke meat. Out of sheer curiosity, I decided to check out the bag that held these ridiculous pellets. Imagine my surprise when I found that 'Signature Blend' was a combination of hickory, maple, and cherry hardwoods that produced the pleasant familiar aroma of barbeque smoke. I was also surprised to learn that pellets burn cleaner than the charcoal and wood chunks I've been using all tese years. I felt a sense of betrayal as I closed the lid on the pellet grill so the ribs could cook. My old Char-Griller sat cold and unused while the smoke wafted from this strange new cooker. I had literally turned my back on the old 'Texas Trio'
When the ribs came off the pellet grill, they looked the same as any other rack of ribs but there was no denying that something had changed. The smoke ring was still there, the bark on the ribs was still there, and I still had to clean up the grate once all was said and done - but something was different. I can't live in denial any longer. I've been cooking on my new Pit Boss Mahogany Series 820D3 Wood Pellet Grill for a few weeks now and I have not been disappointed.
I still have feelings for the Char-Griller, and often find myself leaning against her to drink my coffee when I let my dogs out in the morning. I've cleaned the grates even though I haven’t cooked anything on it since that last batch of smoked chicken. I still haven't replaced the gas regulator. I don't know where I go from here, I just know that I'm still not ready to get rid of my beloved Texas Trio just yet so she just sits there while I continue to experiment with 'pellet cookery'
To be perfectly honest with everyone, I'm writing this while a 7 pound bone-in pork butt is smoking over a blend of Apple, Maple, and Cherry hardwood pellets. So far I’ve smoked a 3 pound beef roast over Jack Daniels Blend Pellets - and it came off the grill tasting like a medium rare steak. Sliced thin, and piled high on pretzel buns with a dab of horseradish and some melted cheese - we had roast beef sandwiches that rivaled the Arby's Beef and Cheddar. Two racks of 3-2-1 Memphis style baby backs came out so succulent and juicy that they looked like they had been brushed with BBQ sauce.
I know some will judge me - so be it – those are the limits of YOUR life while you rule over your own little kingdom of BBQ prejudice and a sour bigotry towards alternative cookstyles. I prefer diversity and inclusion when it is time to cook succulent juicy delicious smoked meats in a judgment free dining room.
My kitchen is your safe space if you dare enter!
