Science: Newly Discovered Element

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by kew_el_steve, Nov 10, 2007.

  1. kew_el_steve

    kew_el_steve Smoking Fanatic OTBS Member

    Newly Discovered Element, Gv 312
    > Recent hurricanes and gasoline issues are proof of the existence of a
    > new chemical element. Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest
    > element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has
    > one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant
    > deputy neutrons giving it an atomic mass of 312.
    > These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are
    > surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
    > Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be
    > detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into
    > contact.
    > A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction (that would
    > normally take less than a second) anytime from four days to four years
    > to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of two to six years;
    > it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a
    > portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
    > In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since
    > each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming
    > isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists
    > to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical
    > concentration.
    > This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass. When
    > catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element
    > that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as
    > many peons but twice as many morons.
  2. cowgirl

    cowgirl Smoking Guru OTBS Member

    LOL!! Good one Steve!!! Thanks!
  3. monty

    monty Master of the Pit Staff Member Moderator OTBS Member SMF Premier Member

    Here's a scary thought!

    I was acturally able to follow your thesis!

  4. deejaydebi

    deejaydebi Smoking Guru

    That was great Steve! [​IMG]
  5. bigarm's smokin

    bigarm's smokin Master of the Pit OTBS Member

    Hey Steve, the trouble is, this shouldn't be posted in "JOKES" [​IMG][​IMG][​IMG]
  6. kew_el_steve

    kew_el_steve Smoking Fanatic OTBS Member

    Hey BigArm,

    You aint kidding.

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