Pissed off co-worker :(

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Meat Mopper
Original poster
OTBS Member
Feb 6, 2006

I have started bringing in my cooking efforts for our team at work. It is a 12 person department. I get rave reviews for everything I have brought in.

I had a co-worker ask if she brought me some meat would I smoke it for her. I explained that I have a large BGE and that grate space is limited. I explained how long it takes to smoke something. I even have a grate extender on order as I have to smoke in shifts (just not enough grate room). I apologized and said I would if that was not an issue.

She got pissed off at me and has been telling the group I refused to do it while omitting why.

Man, pisses me off. I do something nice, several times now, and I get crap from it :(.

Sorry had to rant,

Sorry to hear about that, some people just want and want.. She should be happy that you are sharing in the first place.
Well, maybe you could do something small for her, only problem, if you do it for her, everyone might expect it. Why don't you tell her to get a grill/smoker and offer to give her and her hubby some lessons! You know, don't give a starving man a fish rather teach him to fish!
MANY times that is the thanks you get when you do something nice. I find it harder and harder to go out of my way for people. Except my good friends of course. It shouldn't be that way, but you just get tired of getting burned.
That's a tough one... one bad apple will spoil the barrel.

Get your co-workers together for an impromptu "meeting", right in front of her, and explain to them what you explained to her. Don't get nasty, just explain the facts. Maybe she'll then get the message straight...
Tell her you will gladly do it. Tell her how many hours it will take and what you charge per hour..........make it worth your while.
Know what ya mean Brian. A last month I did a rib smoke for the guys on my staff and their families. A gal that works in the same area asked if she bought a rack of ribs if I would smoke it for her providing that there was space available; not a problem.

She brought me her rack of ribs (which happend to be the same brand that I had bought) and I smoked her ribs K.C. style, vac-packed her smoked ribs, skirt meat and ribtips and ran them over to her place. The following week she was complaining that the ribs I gave her were not the ribs that she had bought. I vowed then and there never again to smoke meats for anyone unless they are close friends or family.

Last week a guy from the same work area asked if I could smoke 8 rack of ribs if he provides the ribs and the ingredients for the rub, he said that the ribs were for his daughters' engagement party . Told him I could but I'd have to charge him my catering cooking rate in order to do so. Told him it would take approx. 7 hours and I charge $20.00 an hour. He said that he'll get back with me!! Me thinks he was looking for a freeby smoke.
Just goes to show ya that no good deed goes unpunished. I agree with the whole "give a man a fish..." analogy. Invite your coworker(s) over for a BBQ and insist they help with the WHOLE THING be it over night or up at oh god thirty. Give them an appreciation for the effort you lovingly put in to your art and they should probably whine less about favors that you aren't able to perform.
Ya that does suck. I think people that aren't familiar with it don't truely understand or appreciate the effort it takes to produce good eats from a smoker. Even though you attmpted to explain that to her it obviously went in one ear and out the other. I like Brennan's idea of inviting her over and having her help with the ENTIRE process. Thats enlightenment at its best.
You know, thinking about this, I think Brennon has a good idea. Sometimes in life it's better to teach and share with people to get them to understand your side because by just telling them won't work because they've never experienced it. By her asking you to smoke for her it's a clear sign she enjoys the outcome, you should take that as a compliment. Now, show her the actual effort you put into it! Believe me, this will go a loooong way in the office.
It's gotta be very frustrating. You do a good deed and you get badmouthed for not doing more. Some people expect and expect and no matter what you do will never be satisfied. Those people are best ignored.
I get the same sentiments with brewing... and no, people do not appreciate the amount of time it takes to make something of quality.

I do medieval reenacting and one beverage I produce for that is mead. It's a honeywine if you've never heard of it. It's an amazing drink, but takes a minimum of 8 months to make a decent batch. I'm to the point now where I rarely bottle before 10 months of batch aging and then dole it out with care!

Have people ask me all the time, can I get several bottles of that from you? Like it's something I just run thru a blender. I usually tell them to bring me 3-6 lbs of honey and they can be on the list for the next batch and that will be ready in a year.

Only close friends seem to understand and I know it'll be the same with smoked stuff too...
Yes, people are people, and they just don't change. I guess, just try to forgive them and learn from the experience.
I'll bet a large majority of the members here have this same problem; I have had it quite a few times with a half dozen people. I will share my smoked products with just about anybody, but have gotten where I only smoke for close family and a few close friends pending the circumstances.

I have one friend that has a smoker (he has used it once) but still has the balls to ask me to smoke stuff for him. If I do smoke for him, he will be there the entire time to help and will cover all costs but he always asks me to smoke for him when it is convenient for him (and last minute) and doesn't accept I have other plans. He just wants me to drop everything when the time is right for him. He and I have had our differences about this so now when he asks I avoid the entire problem and remind him that he has a smoker.
Dutch sorta hit on this one... when you charge folks for what you do, they look at you like you have two heads and have more balls than Brunswick.

Now, I'm building up a part time bbq catering biz. The purpose is threefold... It will give my wife and I something fun to do together with income. When retirement comes, we'll still have something fun to do with income. Plus, we both love BBQ and feeding people, with income; what a better way?!

Long story short, enter the "buddy" who "knows" you'll do him a big favor, expects you to drop to your knees and thank him for the honor of busting your aggots and jump at the opportunity of his last minute request to Q up some ribs for "his" BBQ... tomorrow. You tell him what it will cost him, he stammers and stutters, then says he'll just do hamburgers and hotdogs, then walks away all pissed off.

It happens. You have to draw the line, and make it clear.

Kinda like when I bought a pickup truck... everyone was my friend, and I found relatives I never knew existed.
I with the idea of teachin em to fish (BBQ)

Only thing is if they don't get the bug to BBQ themself they may back at your feet, only with a bit more humility
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