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Discussion in 'Jokes' started by beer-b-q, Dec 19, 2009.
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!! Goooooooood one, Paul!
Now that is funny Paul.............
Too funny !
Elin Nordegren moved to the top of the money list on the PGA tour todayafter "beating" the world's #1 golfer.The win came after the top golfer played the wrong hole.
Little Johnny and Early Dismissal
It is near the end of the school year. The teacher has turned in her grades. There is really nothing to do. All the kids are restless because there is nothing to do and it is near the end of the day.
The teacher says, “Whoever answers the questions I ask first and correctly can leave early today.” Little Johnny says to himself, “Good, I want to get outta here. I’m smart and will answer the question.”
The teacher asked, “Who said, ‘Four Score and Seven Years Ago’?” Before Johnny could open his mouth, Susie said, “Abraham Lincoln.” The teacher said, “That’s right Susie, you can go..” Johnny was MAD. Susie answered first.
The teacher asked, “Who said, ‘I Have a Dream’.” Before Johnny could open his mouth, Mary said, “Martin Luther King.” The teacher said, That’s right, Mary, you can go.” Johnny was even MADDER than before. Mary answered first.
The teacher asked, “Who said, ‘Ask not what your country can do for you’?” Before Johnny could open his mouth, Nancy said, “John F. Kennedy.” The teacher said, “That’s right, Nancy , you can go.” Johnny was BOILING MAD that Nancy answered first.
Then the teacher turned her back, and Johnny said, “I wish these bit^%$s would keep their mouths shut.”
The teacher asked, “Who said that?”
Johnny said, “Tiger Woods! Can I go now?”
Oh man, both of those jokes are too funny.