It is so cold here. Well how cold is it?

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cheech

Master of the Pit
Original poster
OTBS Member
Dec 19, 2005
2,333
14
Beautiful Grand Rapids Michigan
It was so cold . . .
we had to stop eating with metal cutlery. Some people walked around for days with spoons or forks stuck to their tongues!

It was so cold...
hitchhikers were holding up pictures of thumbs!

It was so cold . . .
pickpockets were sticking their hands in strangers' pockets just to keep them warm!

It was so cold . . .
words froze in the air. If you wanted to hear what someone said, you had to grab a handful of sentences and take them in by the fire!

It was so cold . . .
the politicians had their hands in their OWN pockets!


It was so cold . . .
Richard Simmons started wearing pants!


It was so cold . . .
people stopped complaining about the radioactive steam coming out of manholes!
 
If you liked that one here are some others


It was so cold...
the politicians at city hall stopped blowing hot air.

It was so cold . . .
down at the city morgue, you couldn't tell the stiffs from the guys who worked there!

It was so cold...
when I turned on the shower - I got hail!

It was so cold...
firemen couldn't get to burning buildings because of the crowds of people just wanting to "hang out" somewhere warm!
 
It was so cold...
a recent poll in town indicated that 92% of the inhabitants no longer considered global warming a bad thing!

It was so cold...
kids were telling the most outrageous lies - hoping their pants might catch on fire!

It was so cold...
groping in crowds was considered acceptable as long as you were wearing big woolly mittens.

It was so cold...
bed bugs promised not to bite - as long as you let them huddle in your jammies!

It was so cold...
hunters were coming home empty handed - bullets refused to leave the warmth of the gun barrel!

It was so cold...
I tried to take the garbage out - but it didn't want to go!

It was so cold...
the lights would only go on in the house if we opened the door.
 
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