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Senator Hillary Clinton (D, NY) and former Attorney General Janet Reno were having one of those girl-to-girl talks, and Hillary says to Janet, "You're lucky that you don't have to put up with men having sex with you. I have to put up with Bill, and there is no telling where he was last."

Janet responds, "Just because I am aesthetically challenged [that's "politically correct" for ugly as a mud fence] does not mean I don't have to fight off unwelcome sexual advances."

Hillary asks, "Well, how do you deal with the problem?"

Janet: "Whenever I feel that a guy is getting ready to make a pass at me, I muster all my might, tense, and squeeze to break wind as loud and hard as I can."

Hillary: "Great idea ... I'll have to try it."

That night, Bill was already in bed with the lights out when Hillary slips into bed. She could hear him start to stir, and knew that he would be wanting some action. She had been saving gas all day long and was ready for him. She tenses up her butt cheeks and forces out the most disgusting sound you could imagine.

Bill rolls over and says, "Janet, is that you?