Newly Discovered Element, Gv 312
>
>
> Recent hurricanes and gasoline issues are proof of the existence of a
> new chemical element. Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest
> element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has
> one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant
> deputy neutrons giving it an atomic mass of 312.
>
> These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are
> surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
> Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be
> detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into
> contact.
>
> A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction (that would
> normally take less than a second) anytime from four days to four years
> to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of two to six years;
> it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a
> portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
>
> In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since
> each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming
> isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists
> to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical
> concentration.
>
> This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass. When
> catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element
> that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as
> many peons but twice as many morons.
>
>
> Recent hurricanes and gasoline issues are proof of the existence of a
> new chemical element. Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest
> element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has
> one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant
> deputy neutrons giving it an atomic mass of 312.
>
> These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are
> surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
> Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be
> detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into
> contact.
>
> A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction (that would
> normally take less than a second) anytime from four days to four years
> to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of two to six years;
> it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a
> portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
>
> In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since
> each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming
> isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists
> to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical
> concentration.
>
> This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass. When
> catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element
> that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as
> many peons but twice as many morons.