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R+ but pretty funny.

post #1 of 7
Thread Starter 
Here's yer chance to intercept/delete this one....

A cowboy walks into a bar and two steps in, he
realizes it's a gay bar. But what the heck, he says
to himself, "I can really use a drink."

When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the cowboy,
"What's the name of your wee-wee?"

The cowboy says, "Look, I'm not into any of that, all
I want is a drink."

The gay waiter says, "Im sorry but I can't serve you
until you tell me the name of your wee-wee. Mine for
instance is called Nike, the slogan for 'Just Do It,'
and that guy down at the end of the bar calls his
Snickers, because it really 'Satisfies'."

The cowboy looks dumbfounded so the bartender tells
him he will give him a second to think it over. So
the cowboy asks the man sitting to his left, who is
sipping a beer, "Hey bud, what's the name of yours?"

The man looks back and says with a smile, "Timex," and
the thirsty cowboy asks, "Why Timex?" The fella
proudly replies, "'Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps
on tickin!"

A little shaken, the cowboy turns to two fellas on his
right, who happen to be sharing a fruity Margarita and
says, "So, what do you guys call yours?"

The first man turns to him and proudly exclaims,
"Ford, because Quality is Job One." Then he adds,
"Have you driven a Ford lately?"

The guy next to him then says, "I call mine Chevy,
'Like a Rock!'" and gives a wink.

Even more shaken, the Cowboy has to think for a moment
before he comes up with a name.

He exclaims, "The name of my wee-wee is 'Secret' now
give me a dang beer!"

The bartender begins to pour the cowboy a beer, but
with a puzzled look asked, "Why Secret?"

The cowboys says, "Because its strong enough for a man
,but made for a woman!
post #2 of 7
Thats a good one!
post #3 of 7
That is funny!
post #4 of 7


biggrin.gif Two lawyers are stranded on a desert island for several months.

The only thing on the island was a tall coconut

tree, which provided them their only food. Each

day one of the lawyers would climb to the top to

see if he could spot a rescue boat coming.

One day, the lawyer yelled down from the tree,"WOW,

I just can't believe my eyes, there is a woman out there floating in

direction." The lawyer on the ground was most skeptical and said,

hallu-cinating; you've finally lost your mind."

But within a few minutes, up to the beach floated a stunning red head,

Face up, totally naked, unconscious without even so
much as a ring or earrings On her.

The two lawyers went down to the water, dragged her up on the beach

discovered, yes, indeed she was alive, warm and breathing, but

and needing immediate care and nursing.

One said to the other (as a typical male would), "You know, we've been

this God-forsaken island for months now without a woman. It's been
such a

long, long time. Do you think we should...well--you know screw her?"

(ok--you're gonna love this)

"Out of WHAT?", asked the other lawyer
post #5 of 7
Dang you Tee-you forgot to post a spew warning!! Oh well my monitor needed cleaning anyhoo!!
post #6 of 7
Both good ones
post #7 of 7
Warning ....Politically incorrect joke ahead!

Was depressed last night so I called Lifeline.

Got a call center in Pakistan.

Told them I was suicidal,

they got all excited and asked if I could fly a plane!
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