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Because I'm A Man

post #1 of 3
Thread Starter 
Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in
the car, I will fiddle with a coat hanger long

after hypothermia has set in.

Calling AAA is not an option.

I will win.

Because I'm a man, when the car isn't running

very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the

engine as if I know what I'm looking at.

If another man shows up, one of us will say to

the other, "I used to be able to fix these things,

but now with all these computers and

everything, I wouldn't know where to start."

We will then drink a couple of beers and break

wind, as a form of holy communion.

Because I'm a man, when one of our
appliances stops working, I will insist on taking

it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost

me twice as much once the repair person

gets here and has to put it back together.

Because I'm a man, there is no need to ask

me what I'm thinking about.

The true answer is always either sex, cars, sex,

sports or sex. I have to make up something

else when you ask, so just don't ask.

Because I'm a man, I think what you're wearing

is fine. I thought what you were wearing five

minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of

shoes is fine. With the belt or without it,

looks fine. It does not make your ass look

too big. It was the pasta and potatoes and

margaritas that did that. Your hair is fine.

You look fine. Can we just go now?

Because I'm a man, and this is, after all,

the year 2007, I will share equally in the

housework. You just do the laundry, the

cooking, the cleaning, the vacuuming,

and the dishes, and I'll do the rest. Like

wandering around in the garden with a

beer, wondering what to do.

This has been a public service message for

women to better understand men.

post #2 of 3
sounds like a simple explination to me!
post #3 of 3
HAHAHAHA I have actually done a few of them.
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