The Jamaican Doctor's Assistant A Doctor in Jamaica wanted to get off work to go play a game of golf, so he approached his office assistant. 'George, I am going golfing tomorrow and I don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all me patients.' 'Yes, sir!' answers George. The doctor goes golfing the next day and returns the following day and asks: 'So, George, how was your day?' George told him that he took care of three patients. 'The first one had a headache so I gave him TYLENOL.' 'Bravo mate! And the second one?' asks the doctor. 'The second one had stomach burning and I gave him MAALOX, sir,' says George. 'Bravo, bravo! You're good at this, and what about the third one?' 'Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and a woman enters. Like a flash, she undresses herself, taking off everything including her bra and her panties. She lies down on the table, and says, 'HELP ME! For five years I have not seen any man!' 'Thunderin' lard Jesus, George, what did you do?' 'I put DROPS in her eyes.'