100 Best Ways !!!

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by dick bullard, Jan 13, 2010.

  1. Okay.....here is the situation.....I live in a suburban area and one of the things I hate to contend with is getting rid of my water pan drippings after a good smoke....! Sure I could save them and put in my next smoked beans....but how many beans can I smoke? If I store them in a plastic container and put them in my garbage can....I find myself peering out between the curtains in the front room after the garbage truck has picked up my cans just waiting for this liquid to start dripping out of the truck and leaving a nice line on the asphalt for a block or two!!! Actually there is some humor to that, but it does become a road hazard!!! So now is the time to unleash that creativity that's been stagnet in you for so long and give us your take on some of the most creative ways to dump !
    STARTERS......

    1. Pour them over the fence in your neighbor's yard !

    2. Let neighbor"s dog eat them !

    3. Use them to give spouse a rub down !

    4. Mail them to someone you don't know !
     
  2. smokin' dick

    smokin' dick Smoking Fanatic

    5. Pour it in the garden, on top of the winter compost. Helps to flavor the vegetables!

    6. Even better. Don't use any water. A flower pot base and some foil is your best friend.
     
  3. rbranstner

    rbranstner Smoking Guru OTBS Member

    7. I throw mine out in the lawn or in the ditch in my back yard if there is a lot.
     
  4. coffee_junkie

    coffee_junkie Master of the Pit OTBS Member

    I had my son dig a hole in the field (that I own) next door, I fill it with all of my drippings, ashes from my smokers, wood stove, fire pit, cover it up and have him dig a new hole. He thinks its fun to dig because he finds all kind of crap that he referrs to as "treasures"
     
  5. thunderdome

    thunderdome Master of the Pit

    09. Pour into the rocks, and then hose down for 20 mins so the dogs stop licking the rocks. And say "oh sh*t" everytime I open the smoker realizing I forgot to empty/clean it from the last smoke
     
  6. the dude abides

    the dude abides Master of the Pit OTBS Member

    10. Pour it into the sewer drain in front of my house after dark and hope nobody rats me out. It's just water and liquid fat right. Worse crap dripping off of cars.
     
  7. smokemifugotem

    smokemifugotem Meat Mopper SMF Premier Member

    11. put it in a soup can and set it along the back fence line to "lure in" the neighborhood cats. ...did i ever mention how much fun Red Ryder bb guns are???LOL
     
  8. tn_bbq

    tn_bbq Smoking Fanatic

    Bingo.

    I have to pour mine either in the trash can or OVER my fence. Otherwise, my dog will find it and lick the dirt. She loves BBQ'ing about as much as I do cause she gets to lick up all the drippings.

    I love my dog, but sometimes she just gets in the way.
     
  9. kurtsara

    kurtsara Smoking Fanatic OTBS Member

    I got one from my son for xmas, only because he broke my bb gun this past summer

    12. Put in plastic bottles and put in dumpster at the mall. Wife has a beauty shop at the mall so it's part of her garbage
     
  10. desertlites

    desertlites Master of the Pit OTBS Member

    09. Pour into the rocks, and then hose down for 20 mins HELLO -you live in Arizona and were running outta water-switch to sand.
     
  11. john3198

    john3198 Smoking Fanatic

    Put it in a plastic baggie. Put baggie in box. Wrap box like a Christmas present. Leave in unlocked car at mall. Will disappear in seconds.
     
  12. pops6927

    pops6927 Smoking Guru Staff Member Moderator Group Lead OTBS Member SMF Premier Member

    Pour into a small round wastebasket and freeze, then put into a plastic garbage bag. Gather a few then take to the woods and put out in your salt lick or wildlife cam spots.
     
  13. kurtsara

    kurtsara Smoking Fanatic OTBS Member

    You can have one of our lake, although they are froze at the moment
     
  14. Now that's a great idea!!!!![​IMG]
     
  15. jdt

    jdt Smoking Fanatic SMF Premier Member

    13. give it to a crazy fishing buddy who uses it in his doughballs
     
  16. brohnson

    brohnson Smoking Fanatic

    Stock pile it in 5 gallon buckets and use it for bear bait the following year.
     
  17. q dawg

    q dawg Smoke Blower

    I save mine up all year in a 5 gal. bucket....then just before winter I us it to seal my asphalt driveway !!! First couple of weeks it's a little hard getting in and out of the attatched garage thought....and if the weather warms up too much the car has a tendency to slide down to the end of my driveway on its own.......??? Ya THINK !!!???

    Q Dawg
     
  18. Okay people...!! Only about 75 more to go....so here are couple more that have real potential.....!

    16. Use it to seal your leather work boots !

    17. Store it in plastic gallon milk containers in the loft of your garage until you sell the house and let the new owner worry about it !
    ( I think this one may just have more potential than we realize !!!)
     
  19. gnubee

    gnubee Master of the Pit OTBS Member SMF Premier Member

    18. Leave in a plastic ziplock bag out in full sunlight till bag is puffed up real tight. Then put it in a dark place for a few days to a week. Makes it rancid as all get out, when rubbed on wrists and forehead keeps gnats, chiggers and mosquitos at bay. Also the little woman will not hang around very long talking your ear off.

    19. Warmed and strained thru cheese cloth with some rosemary and bits of dried orange peel added then poured into tuna fish cans with a bit of string for a wick till it sets. Makes a nice Christmas candle to give the mother in law.

    20. Take a bit of it back to the back to the Butcher, complain that this vile stuff dripped out of the last brisket he sold you, a surefire refund getter.

    21. When a drop or two added to customers tailpipe at your auto repair shop, customer will see that thick blue-black smoke pouring out the back of his car and will gladly agree to that complete engine overhaul you suggested he get.

    22. Makes a nice cross country ski wax.

    22. Use it in tanning that deer hide.

    23. Substitute for Brylcream ...... a little gob will do ya! You'll look so debonair.

    24. Apply liberally to that squeeky wheel on your lawnmower

    25. Mixed with Peanut butter Is a good substitute for 10 w 30 motor oil.

    26. Great at burnout contests, slip some onto your competitors tires and enjoy seeing the rear end or their cars brew up in flames.

    27. 1 drop in 150 grains of black powder will convert your bullet into a tracer round.

    28. Spray on grassy hill side for a eco friendly summertime ski hill.

    29. Sprayed in a thick layer on the pavement makes crowd control a moot point.

    30. Makes a great trombone oil

    31. Rubbed on in generous proportions helps clear up Elephants achne problems.
     
  20. garyt

    garyt Smoking Fanatic

    Mix with a little Dawn dish washing liquid and pour down the drain.
     

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